


These Big City Dreams

by Satellites_and_Stars



Category: All Time Low (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - No Band, Depression, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-26
Updated: 2020-10-26
Packaged: 2021-03-08 20:47:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27202673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Satellites_and_Stars/pseuds/Satellites_and_Stars
Summary: Nobody told Jack how lonely college life would be. Good thing he's got Alex.
Kudos: 8





	These Big City Dreams

**Author's Note:**

> It's been a while since I've posted a one-shot, hasn't it? Anyways, this goes out to one of my best friends. Hope you like it!

Most kids dream of growing up, leaving suburbia, and escaping to the big city to live the life they always wanted to. They’d spend every weekend going to parties and bars, staying out til four in the morning, running down moonlit streets, and just being free. Finally getting to be who they want to be.

Of course, all that sounds great in theory, but sometimes, things don’t always turn out the way they’re expected to, and the city can swallow you up into the bright lights and crowded streets until you’re nothing more than a ghost.

Jack pulled his black coat tighter around him as the frigid air made his eyes water. It was a cold February night in New York City, but despite the chilly weather, the streets were packed with people trying to make the best of their Saturday night.

Rows of red brick townhouses lined the sidewalk, inside of which more groups of happy-looking people were talking and laughing with each other. Pulling his gaze away from the warm glow of the houses, Jack put his focus into getting back to his dorm building and out of the cold. Like the idiot that he was, he’d forgotten to wear gloves, and he was beginning to lose all feeling in his fingers.

Ten minutes and 14 flights of stairs later (goddamn elevator was broken _again_ ), Jack unlocked the door to his dorm and stepped inside, letting out a sigh of relief when he saw that his roommate wasn’t there. It wasn’t that he didn’t like his roommate; he just knew that they wouldn’t get along. There was a brief period during the first two weeks of school where they’d made a somewhat awkward attempt to be friends, but after it was clear that they had next to nothing in common, they’d pretty much ignored each other’s existence ever since. Jack was okay with that though, it didn’t really bother him all that much.

He threw his coat onto the floor and collapsed onto his bed. It was only 8 o’clock, too early to go to sleep, but there wasn’t much else to do except stare at his poster-covered wall and listen to the sound of nearby rooftop parties and police sirens. And yet, all that noise still wasn’t loud enough to distract from the drowning loneliness that crept out of the dark corners of the room.

What an absolute loser. What college student spends their Saturday nights alone and bored in their own room? Two years at this school, and Jack had yet to make a single friend. Not even a casual acquaintance. And all that did was solidify the fact that he didn’t belong there. Everyone else seemed like they were in such a rush to grow up and were all so much smarter than him. It was a wonder that he was even accepted.

There was that girl, though, who he shared a class with his freshman year. She was cute and a good student too. Jack passed by her on his way out the door one day, and she complimented his band tee and the pins on his backpack. The conversation couldn’t have lasted more than ten seconds, but he’d taken that as an offer of friendship. The next week, he asked if she’d like to hang out sometime, to which she’d said yes. Jack gave her his number and, well, never heard from her again. So much for that.

The scars on his wrist began to itch, and Jack was finding it hard to ignore the pair of scissors lying on his desk. It was so easy to walk around with cuts on your arm when nobody around you gave a shit. Still, he didn’t want to give in to the urge that easily and pulled out his phone in an effort to take his mind off of things.

He smiled when he saw a text notification on his cell. There was only one person who bothered to text him first. He quickly unlocked the phone and read the new message.

_Dude, I have so much homework I gotta do this weekend. I’m definitely gonna be up til three am._

As far as good and bad texters went, Alex was definitely one of the best. There was never any open-ended “hi” or “what’s up” and no one-word answers either. He’d jump right into the conversation and could easily keep it going without faltering. Jack certainly appreciated it more than he’d ever admit.

He wasted no time texting Alex back. _Well, I’ll probably be up til three am too, so I’ll keep you company._

Alex’s reply came a few minutes later. _What are you doing up so late? Partying it up with your friends?_

_Yeah, not even close,_ Jack typed back with a scoff. _I still have yet to get any of those._ As he waited for a response, he mustered up the strength to get up off his bed, turn some music on and change into something more comfortable. He sat down in a chair, feet resting on his desk, looking out at the bright moon that hung above the skyline while he waited for another text from Alex.

_Aw, c’mon, you don’t talk to anyone? Not even in any of your classes?_

Jack rocked back and forth in his chair as his fingers flew across the keyboard. _Nope, nobody. It’s sad, I know._

_Well, hey, if it makes you feel better, you’re one of the coolest people I know, so it’s their loss._

_Thanks, buddy,_ Jack texted. _It still kinda sucks not having anyone to talk to, though. Like ever._

_Well, I might not be there in person, but I’m always here to talk to, y’know._

What an Alex thing to say. Jack had never been one for sharing feelings and exposing his weak side to others. He had an image to maintain, and that image didn’t include being a cynical loner. But Alex, on the other hand, he was always the one who wore his heart on his sleeve. Maybe it was because he was so used to putting his emotions out there through his lyrics for anyone to see, but it was something that made Alex different from everyone else.

_Yeah, you’re right. Thanks for that. And sorry for all the depressing shit, by the way._ Jack finished typing and hit send. He did hate himself for dumping all his problems on Alex and not being able to thank him properly. After all, Alex had only told Jack a million times about how much he appreciated their friendship. Jack only wished he could return the favor. But he was absolute shit with words. Alex was the poet. The only comfort that Jack got was knowing that Alex could read him like an open book and almost certainly knew how much he meant to Jack.

Another message notification. _Don’t be sorry. And hey! There’s only like, three more months of school left, and then we can hang out all summer! We gotta make like, a summer bucket list. And we can drag Rian and Zack around with us, too._

If there was one thing Jack could count on, it was that Alex’s enthusiasm could pull him out of any bad mood, even if they were just texting each other.

_Sounds like a plan. I’ll get working on that right away,_ Jack sent with a small smile.

After rubbing his tired eyes, he turned his phone off and laid down in bed. He closed his eyes and drifted off, making a mental checklist of all the fun things he and Alex would do back home over the summer. The pair of scissors lying on his desk were long forgotten.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! You can find me on tumblr @satellites-n-stars


End file.
